New heights for Elias...and then there's Bobby Lashley
Elias just can't seem to stop his streak of awesomeness...while Lashley dispenses another boring turd. Courtesy of the WWE.
By Matthew Klink (@klinkmatt)
September 4, 2018
I was thinking about doing a “Stock Up/Stock Down” type of article for Bobby Lashley and Elias, but then I realized it makes absolutely no sense. First of all, we all know Elias is doing way better than Lashley, so who needs to hear it? Bobby Lashley is boring and bad on the mic while, even though Elias continues to lose every match he is always a marquee piece of every Monday Night Raw.
Secondly, there is the dynamic of a stock being up or down. If Bobby Lashley’s stock continues to head down, eventually it could become a worthwhile stock to consider. The price could hit rock bottom and then it could only go up. You’d be rolling in dough once it came time to cash in. However, I don’t think I’d ever be able to sell his stock even to the most desperate and hardened of Lashley fans.
Like any good salesman, I’d have to believe in some sort of upside or value. Not only am I going to have think of some lie, to sell to my customers, but I’m going to have to be so good at my job, that I could trick myself into believing it. I’m not sure there is anything even remotely believable that I could spew in good conscience.
I’m fairly confident that we’re all in agreement that Lashley was a mistake.
From the Elias perspective, who actually needs to hear that Elias is doing well? Is anyone not on the bandwagon at this point? Was the promo with Trish Stratus last week not enough evidence of this guy’s swagger, confidence, sense of humor, and just overall ownership of his scene? Even when Elias put out a mock-umentary this summer, detailing his “rise” to fame, it only served to put him over that much more. While taking loss after loss in the ring wasn’t enough. Having the guy walk through an arena, completely oblivious to the hate and mockery that followed him, made people love him that much more.
It just goes to show that being a good salesman is always the key to success. Elias doesn’t need to ever pick up a guitar or even know how to play it. But because he owns that role so well (going the lengths of believing he is worthy of being honored in the Madison Square Garden’s rafters) makes him the ultimate superstar.
Lashley, as I’ve mentioned, couldn’t be further from this fact. Lashley is winning all of his feuds. He walks away from each one looking stronger and stronger. This past week he laid waste to the Ascension (who you could easily forget is on the main roster) in a 2-on-1 handicap match. Lashley over-powered the once intimidating tag team and ensured we never have to see them again.
Bobby is even one of the few superstars on the roster who have beaten Roman Reigns. While the match was only for pride and meant nothing to the Universal Title’s storyline, it was still a “signature” victory. He’s been given the opportunity to look like the strongest in company. So why is he falling so far behind his competition? Why do we go crazy when given the chance to “Walk with Elias”, but groan at the idea of watching Lashley tear someone apart? It’s sales.
Being good at sales comes back to knowing your product. Knowing the value and benefits it offers to your customers compared to another product. Elias offers fun. Elias coming to the ring means we’re all going to be entertained for ten minutes because the guy can talk on the mic, sing a song, play the guitar, and he actually has some musical talent to go along with his act. And all of that truth comes without mentioning he is a talented in-ring performer too. Elias is practically Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson, without the victories. The writers have never written a great tag line, it’s the guys that sell it. Elias believes that even after being ridiculed and put down, he is still a high level talent and that we’re still desperate to walk with Elias. Which…we are.
Lashley…is okay in the ring…sometimes…I mean, let’s not forget that he’s all power. If he gets winded or faces a guy that is too big, that spoils the chance we see something truly great. So to us, the Brothers of Discussion, Lashley is a good wrestler in certain circumstances.
The problem is that there are great wrestlers. Beyond that, there are phenomenal ones. Some of them aren’t given the mic time and maybe don’t need it. But we still hold those great wrestlers in high regard because of their unmatched skills.
There are guys in wrestling today that have focused purely on body-building, like Lashley, but also took the time to learn how to act. They don’t have professional sports experience or combat sports training. They just know how to look the part.
There are also so many other great characters that dwarf Lashley in charisma and likability:
There’s dead guys, there’s tall guys, there’s Beasts, Monsters, Heavy Machinery, the Overtly Flamboyant, the Demons, the Broken, the Woken, American heart spoken, the too good for you, the comeback kids, the sore loser, the sore winner, the crass, the badass, the old, the young, sharp witted and quick tongue.
There are so many different things for us to care about or cheer for that are special to us, as an individual fan or they offer unique value to the roster. Lashley just isn’t that special or unique to the world of pro wrestling. He’d definitely stand out in a McDonald’s customer lineup or during a trip to Disney World, but not in that squared circle. Not enough, anyways.
I don’t mean to absolutely bury the guy, but I just don’t see the point in continuing to raise this guy up. He doesn’t move the excitement needle and…unless I’m completely out of touch, I pretty sure he’s not putting butts in the seats. Maybe a heel turn might work for Lashley, but it wouldn’t work now. It would just look confusing and frantic. Like a good fart, he maybe could’ve worked as the silent but deadly type, but instead, he came roaring in, smelling of hot garbage, that only truly serves to clear a room.
It now looks like Lashley is poised to ensure we never believe Kevin Owens is worthy of another Championship opportunity (after Kevin Owens made an absurdly stupid return after quitting only a week ago). I am kidding here, but I don’t know what else to think after seeing the way Lashley has been booked.
Elias on the other hand, is deeply cemented (it seems) in the Women’s Championship feud. I’m not really sure where this will go, but it is absolute gold two weeks in a row. I think its just more evidence that Elias can do no wrong at this point. I’m not quite ready to beg for him to be placed into the main event, but when he eventually is…he’s gonna nail it.
So they are the tale of two different superstars, booked in completely different ways and headed into distant and opposite directions. The direction for Lashley is certainly failing, but I’m not sure it ever fit to bring him in.
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